The two of us have planned to have a talk tonight – a talk about us.  I’m not looking forward to this because I fear it may be the end of our relationship and that just simply kills me on the inside.  I want to continue supporting him through his meth recovery but I also know that I can’t put my children in something like this. I love him but THEY are my first priority.

Can I trust him to continue living with us right now without the devil rearing its ugly head?  Is it possible that we can live separately for a bit, him stay clean, and us work this out?  Or will tonight be us parting ways for good?

I wish someone could give me all the answers.  It feels like God has abandoned this situation completely but I have to believe that He has not.  Hopefully, He’ll guide us both in the right direction this evening. I hate making tough decisions and hate this feeling in the pit of my stomach.  I also hate living in the depths of hell inside of my own home.

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